Interactions with the Tech Guy

The other day our internet went down. This is always a huge tragedy at our house because we are both constantly on the internet for work or school and sometimes pleasure. After unplugging and replugging everything I could think of, I gave in and called our internet service provider to see if they could shed some light on the situation. I first spoke with a woman, who basically asked me to do what I had already done...unplug a bunch a stuff and then plug it all back in to see if it could be fixed. When that didn't work, she told me that she would have to have her technician call me back.

Several minutes later, the technician called me. He started by asking me the name on the account (The Family Support and Treatment Center...since our internet is through our work). Before saying anything else, he immediately was like "Oh that is SO great!!! I started two parents advocates groups because I went through this really horrible divorce, with a very abusive wife. It was just so bad, you would not even believe it and going through the court system was just a nightmare." At this point, I was already thinking this was just too much information. Unfortunately, it did not stop there. He proceeded to tell me that he now had three more boys, in addition to the one child he had with his ex. He told me that he and his ex get along really well now and that he now understands her mental illness and how much that has helped their relationship. 

He had me a check a few things on the internet problem and then jumped right back into his personal life. He told me about how Verizon had come out with this commercial where they talked about how one in four women are beaten and all the effects that domestic violence has on women and children. He explained to the me that the police system and court system and government systems (I am assuming he means APS and CPS) always favor the women and how this was a horrible injustice to all men. 

He seemed to be quite outraged at the fact that "EVERYONE believes that it is the man's fault" and that in the twenties it was totally opposite, but now women were able to control the situation and how unfair this was to men. He then began insisting that I get online and watch the video so that I knew of the atrocity this Verizon commercial was. I very nicely said "I will, if my internet ever gets fixed." 

Thankfully that got him back on task and he fixed my internet, reminding me at the end to be sure to watch that video. Tonight I watched it (I'll embed it so you can too.)

After watching it and thinking about what my tech "friend" had to say, I just want to say the following. Having worked for both Child Protect Services (CPS) and the Family Support and Treatment Center(FSTC), I have to agree with the statistics in this ad. I believe that the majority of the time it holds true that women are the ones being abused by the men. More than 3/4 of the cases I have seen, both at CPS and FSTC, the perpetrator was male. This is not to say that men are not EVER the victim, but it would only make sense to me that in a campaign to reach out to victims of domestic violence, they are going to target those that are most often victims. 

I do not think the Verizon's message was that every young child fears their father because every father beats his children, I simply think that they were trying to illustrate a situation most similar to that which the majority of victims would be able to relate to. 

To the tech guy, I'm sorry that you went through such a horrible situation and I am sure that there was injustice done to you, but this does not mean that there is still not a very large population of women that are victims of domestic violence who need to know there are places they can go/call to receive help. And in the future...I just want my internet fixed...not to hear your entire history of messed up relationships!